Going through a divorce can be an overwhelming, uncertain and confusing experience for many people.

Trying to navigate through the different pathways available to resolve your parenting, property and money issues can be frustrating and costly.


I’m often asked, as a mediator, how to find the best mediator when going through a divorce?

It’s an important question because a mediator can either make or break your ability to negotiate and agree.

One of my clients recently told me that he spent 2 years in mediation with his ex-partner, only to discover at the end of this exhausting process, he needed to go to Court because he was dealing with a high conflict ex, who was unable to let go and make decisions.

If you’re going through divorce and need to find a Mediator, here are 5 things you should look out for:

1. All family law mediators must have accreditation and if they are mediating parenting issues, they must also be Family Dispute Resolution Practitioners.
Check out their qualifications so you can be sure that you are dealing with the right mediator.
For more information on accreditation check out the Attorney-General’s Department website on: https://www.ag.gov.au/FamiliesAndMarriage/Families/FamilyDisputeResolution/Pages/Becomingafamilydisputeresolutionpractitioner.aspx

2. Mediators are neutral facilitators of the mediation process. They are not meant to show bias or have pre-judged the outcome of the mediation. If you sense bias or pre-judgment, then either discuss this with your mediator or move on.

3. Mediators do not give legal advice, even if they are lawyers. Some mediators, are also lawyers, however they cannot not give specific legal advice because this compromises their independence. Occasionally, parties may request a legal opinion on an issue and the mediator who has legal qualifications may choose to provide this opinion.

4. They take an even-handed and empathetic approach. Great mediators take the time to get to know what is important to you. They are considerate of your circumstances and take a sensitive approach to you and your ex.

5. Mediators create a safe space for you and your ex to communicate respectfully and with fairness. They give each of you an opportunity to speak and bring to the mediation table issues that are important to you.

For more information on Mediators go to:




The information provided above is not legal advice. It is intended as general information on mediation for people going through a divorce or separation.

Pamela Cominos, specialist Family Lawyer, Independant Children’s Lawyer, Collaborative Family Lawyer, Accredited Mediator and Child Dispute Family Practitioner.